In the headlines of today’s Daily News Record, the local newspaper:

“Record Deficit Expected: White House Predicts $445 Billion Shortfall”

The phrase “No shit, Sherlock!” comes to mind.
Also, in yesterday’s newspaper, front page article:

“County’s Manure Best in Nation”

You know you live in a rural area when an article about manure makes the top of the front page.

Exactly five hours ago, my incredibly annoying relatives from Georgia arrived to wreak their annual havoc on Harrisonburg. Thankfully, they always stay at their timeshare up in Massanutten, and I have to work this weekend (I’ll never be happier to work a weekend!), so hopefully I won’t see much of them.

I’m particularly dreading their visit because during their last visit, my cousin set off my incredibly-inaccurate gaydar many times. I asked him on AIM later if he was gay, he said he wasn’t (duh), and he asked why I was asking. I took a gamble and came out to him, and the gamble didn’t pay off. He seemed very distant for the rest of the conversation, and I haven’t spoken to him or seen him online since. I’m a little worried that he told his parents, who are a couple of prejudiced hicks (I can’t believe they’re on my MOM’s side of the family sometimes, she’s supposed to have the good relatives). I’m also a bit concerned that he’ll mention it when there are people around, so far my mom is the only one in the family who knows (that I know of).

Speaking of gayness, in light of Skippy’s upcoming visit to the Valley, I’m thinking about coming out to my sister. The other night at Boston Beanery, we were talking about gay people, and she seemed ok with the subject, she even knows two gay kids in her grade, and she’s 13. So, I’ll probably do that after the Georgians leave. Any advice on how I should go about it? I haven’t done this in quite awhile, I was going to talk to her over AIM, since that’s the primary mode of communication for both of us.

FelixSoftpaw: I’m so gay, I’m ripping an ABBA CD to MP3s
skippyfox cub: wow dude
skippyfox cub: that’s gayer than gay porn

I’m such a girl

First of all, thanks for the supportive responses to my last post. I get really depressed occasionally, and angsty LJ posts just kinda flow. On to the real update:

The other day I installed a new mod to my computer case; an integrated automotive-style 12v power port. I bought one designed to be installed in a pickup truck bed from Wal-Mart, and I got a small indicator light for it because I like shiny glowy stuff. Since I don’t have a real drill, just a Dremel tool that’s too small for my drill bits, I had my good friend trlovejoy bring a drill over. I was hoping he’d have a drill bit or hole-saw big enough, but no such luck, so I ended up having to Dremel it anyway. Still came out looking nice, I’ll have to take some pics soon.

I also got my new keyboard in, and I LOVE it! It’s shiny and glowy! And it feels really durable (which it better be, for what I paid for this thing :-P), so it should last me awhile. The backlight colour perfectly matches my XM tuner and computer case, too!

XM041 (The Boneyard) is playing a 420-song Rush marathon, so go listen to it! Rush ROCKS! Best band EVER!

In reading some Live Journals today, I came across the journal of a new friend of mine. This guy really rocks, and so does his mom, and it really hurt me when I read in his journal that they’re in severe financial trouble that makes my own problems look like I lost my lunch money or something. They’ve had a series of unfortunate and expensive circumstances come up recently, they relied on some family members to help them, and those family members dropped the ball and completely pulled their support (and, from the sound of it, disappeared completely). This guy and his mom are now basically homeless because of it, with less money between them than I make per month.

And as I read that, I started looking around. I’m staring at a $2000 computer monitor, which sits next to a $2100 CPU tower. Behind me, there’s a $200 computer that does what a $20 router could do. I’m sitting in a chair made of fine french leather, in one of the most expensive townhouses in the entire Shenandoah Valley. I pay $15/month for MUSIC. And yet, I bitch & moan like I’m living out of my car.

It’s undeniable that my bank account is pretty slim, which can be attributed to poor financial planning almost as much as lack of income. However, I look at my surroundings, at the fact that I live rent-free, at the fact that a car was essentially handed to me when I got my license, and an even nicer car was handed to me last spring when its predecessor exhibited signs of imminent death. And then, on evenings like this, I read about debts in the tens of thousands of dollars, having literally nowhere to go, and it makes me want to go jump in front of a dump truck to think how much of a dumbass I am.

See, I tend to have these daydreams of being obscenely wealthy, and being able to give big checks to anyone and everyone who needs it. I probably think about this far too much, as it will never be the case, but my inner child is rather prominent in my life, so an overactive imagination is something I’ve given up on getting rid of. Anyway, whenever I hear about things like this, my mind slips into fantasy mode, and I picture driving down in my shiny dreamcar and handing a lottery-jackpot-sized check to the object of my dilusion. Then I usually come back to reality, look at my double-figure checkbook balance, and tell myself there’s nothing I can do. I partially blame my mom and grandma, who scoff at the idea of giving even spare change to any of my friends who happen to need anything, but I’m not innocent either.

I need to stop whining about not having money, and I need to start actually acting on my altruistic desires again. There’s nothing that hurts me more than friends in need, while I horde expensive computer parts and say there’s nothing I can do. I’m going to try to make a radical change in attitude, I’ve done it once (though I nearly killed myself with guilt in the process), I’ll do it again.

I decided to revert to the blue colour scheme, I got tired of grey. Let me know if you like it or what

Speaking of TRL, he was here for a good while tonight for a small LAN party. He just got a Gear Grip computer carrier like mine, so hopefully we can do this more often. We didn’t do a whole lot of gaming, but we managed to get my mom into a Counter Strike tournament, and we played some UT (old version). He got a lot of work done on his website, as did I, and my forum is ready to open as soon as someone names it (see a couple posts down). Like I said, I don’t want this to be a discussion board about me, but about the world, with me as one of many participants. Therefore, naming it something like “FJL Forum” (as it currently is called) doesn’t seem appropriate or desirable. Unfortunately, I suck at these things, which is why I’m asking the audience for assistance. Thanks!

My good friend TRL has just put up a new photo gallery, with some spiffy personalized site graphics made by me

Check his site out here, his gallery here, and the image I made for him here.

Well, the forum I setup to accompany my site is ready to go, and most of my site is ready to go, but the forum needs a name. I’m trying to make it less about myself and more about general discussion among friends, so simply calling it “FJL Forum” is rather undesirable to me.

As soon as someone suggests a good name, I’ll slap together some graphics and open it up for posting, so any suggestions are more than welcome

One of my feline British friends and I were playing UT tonight, and in the second match, I beat him with 411 kills in Capture the Flag on Facing Worlds, and my team got ten flag captures, he had zero. I like this game, it’s the only one I don’t completely suck at!